A Debriefing Mass DM - Big week for ya girl. I've let myself get too far gone combining Adderall, weed, cigs, and alcohol over the last year, on top of the stress of constant touring and moving my whole life to NYC, my body completely shut down last Saturday. I've accepted that my stand up has also been losing its spark due to the constant substance use. I need to make a big change if I want to keep making people laugh, and quite frankly, stay alive. I would love to hear if anyone on here has had their own experiences with substance abuse, and how their recovery went. Now 6 days into cold turkey cutting myself off from everything, I'm feeling less sick physically, but painfully aware of some of the experiences that have led me to seeking ways to numb my feelings and eliminate my memory. Whether someone is an addict or not, I think we all can relate to avoiding pain. I'm not going anywhere, I'm starting to enjoy the community of people who speak to me here, and I hope that when you interact with me on this platform, it can be a way to tap into yourself in a healthy way, rather than being an addictive mechanism. On a positive note, I've been fully sober for my stand up sets the last two nights for the first time in awhile, and I can feel an electric stage presence returning that I had forgotten. I will be doing another drawing livestream tomorrow from 11am-12pm central time, to relax, breathe, and process some of these feelings through art and physicality. I'm saving up for yoga teacher training to have something to look forward to and keep my body healthy, so I will be posting more random weekly $3-$10 posts this month, and in my sober consideration, I would like to share the naked comedy set with you guys, despite being high on stage, I believe the realness of that moment brought me to my senses, and I'm still proud of myself for being comfortable and honest in that state - that said, I value my body, so I'm setting the video price at $100, released on Halloween as a spooky gift, and I will only leave the video up until November 7th.